Wednesday, March 31, 2010

i am sitting here, mid-laundry, thinking. i am in one of those moods where i go through everything i can remember and try to figure out what i have really done with myself. nothing ever comes up. i have no direction, no real passion, no clear goal, not one building block. i always thought id have immersed myself in something, grand or not, by now. i do nothing with myself. i wonder how much time i have really wasted. how much time has been wasted this week, let alone the last few years. how do you even restart? how do i really begin a process that takes so much time and energy to evolve into something of substance? i am so far behind. so stuck in this groove i have become so used to. i want to experience life already. i want substance in my days. i want something to come home from. something i am constantly working at, towards, from, around, with, whatever. i want more.

i am sitting here, a little more excited about tomorrow.